NAUGHTY SAINT DOUCHEBAG by HB Jasick @HB1085 #newrelease #mustread #excerpt #unreatedbookshelf

He's the worst kind of guy.
A shameless player, working his way through the entire female population. 
He's Douchebag Santa, ladies and gentleman, and I'm forced to work beside him everyday. 
He's the last person I would ever want to be around, let alone be with.
But he's relentless, and he's got his attention set on me.
I wish he didn't, because I'm nowhere near interested.
Except for the fact, that maybe, I am.
I want her.
She likes to say she's not interested. She likes to play hard to get, but it's all a lie.
Her body tells me a different story. She's just as drawn to me, as I am to her.
She's not like the other girls. She's a challenge, It's a good thing I like a challenge. 
She wants me, just as much as I want her.
She just hasn't realized it yet.
Sylvie tries to sneak out of my apartment as I feign sleep. She sucks at being stealthy, and it takes an ass load of willpower to not laugh at how adorable that is.
“Shit! Fuck! Monkey balls cunt snitch!” She curses as her toe slams against the corner of the bed and this time I do laugh, because who the hell swears like that? “You’re awake?” Her face turns a cute little pink when she realizes that she was just caught trying to do the walk of shame. 
I run my hand down my face. “Yeah, babe, I was trying to make sneaking out less awkward for you. I’m a gentleman like that.”
“I was not sneaking out,” she denies. 
“So you were going to kiss me goodbye?” 
“Well, no. You were asleep, and I didn’t want to disturb you.” 
“Babe, you were totally sneaking out,” I chuckle. “And by the way, I can tell that you don’t do this often.” 
“And how can you tell that?” she asks.
“Because you fucking suck at it,” I laugh.
She rolls her eyes and releases a cute little growl of frustration. “Maybe I just didn’t want to hurt your massive ego, when I didn’t want to stick around and cuddle.” She stomps her foot and throws her hand on her hips like the fiery little pixie that she is. “My ride is here. Thank you for taking care of me last night, and being a surprisingly decent human being.” She starts walking towards the door. 
“Darlin’, I will take care of you any night of the week.” Reaching my arms back, I weave my fingers behind my head and lean back. “I do have one question for you, though.”
“Yeah? And what question is that?”
“What the fuck, is a cunt snitch?” 

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